Hello! It’s been a while since I have blogged, mostly because I have finally completed a draft of Chapter 7 of my book…stay tuned!

I am back here now, as the drumbeat of election drama quickens, to share with you all the ride I have taken for the past 2 months with an organization called Braver Angels (formerly Better Angels) that was formed in 2016 to address the polarization in the country. The organization focuses on teaching people how to stay in a room and communicate with people who don’t agree with them personally, with workshops for “lean reds” and “lean blues” and debates with leaders in the community sharing different perspectives.

I participated in several of these events in order to work on my own ability to manage political conflicts that arise in my therapy groups. Specifically, I wanted to better understand my clients who feel and vote differently than I do personally, so that I could identify my own biases and serve as a role model in the group room.

I did notice that the organization has a conservative bent. All of the resolutions being debated were in the affirmative, Donald Trump has been good for (women, the middle class, Black America), and in the book club we discussed a book by Tucker Carlson that had no citations to tether the things he was saying to actual facts . Recently, I unsubscribed from the group because while listening skills and civility were emphasized, there was not an equal emphasis on critical thinking skills, for me a huge priority to counter propaganda from every source. In fact, some of the emails I received from Braver Angels “ambassadors" themselves had the flavor of propaganda.

I did, however, gain some of the insights I was seeking. For one thing, I began to pay more attention to the way I talked about people who differ from me politically with like-minded friends and family. I noticed that the words, “stupid,” “ignorant,” and “crazy,” came up frequently. When I listened to and asked questions of the debaters who disagreed with my positions, they became three-dimensional, with their own motivations and fears dictating their choices. I realized that although we have different motivations and fears, we really should find a way to respect one another and listen to the stories of each other’s lives that have led us on such different paths.

I agree that we are all lost if we turn against one another, if our tribal instincts prevail and we abandon the “better angels” that can bring us together. For president, I can only support a leader who prevails upon these same better angels to tackle injustice and economic inequality rather than inflaming deeply-rooted tensions.